Being myself

June 12, 2011

Ross Jeffries used to say, “why be myself when I can be someone else and get laid?”

That’s actually a deeper question than it seems. When I put on an act to attract girls, I attract the girls that are attracted to the act. If I’m really good at it I end up with lots of girls who are attracted to the unnatural persona I am projecting. That’s fine if that’s the desired result. But is it?

I fell in love with my college girlfriend when I saw her, on a frigid day with fresh snow on the ground and dressed only in sweats, stop while crossing the courtyard to play with a puppy. I was a bit of a puppy myself and it took her pushing me away for being too beta-attentive before she caved and, missing me, returned my love. There’s no better feeling than having a crazy crush returned and falling into each other’s arms.

The pickup artist has the feeling of conquest, but not of loving and being loved back. And after the first hundred girls, it gets old. Not that there aren’t worse problems to have, but to riff on Ross: why be someone else and just get laid when you can be the Alpha version of yourself and get so much more?

When grasshoppers come to the betasattva and ask for advice, I always tell them the most important thing about what it is to be a man: A man knows himself and his work, and no one else’s approval is more important than this knowledge.

I unashamedly am and do, and seek the right woman to invite into my world to play with me, love with me, live with me. It may be for a night or it may be for a lifetime, but it is my world and I am myself.

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